Posts Tagged ‘beliefs

10
Sep
13

Belief before Speech

 

Duck Dynasty  560Jim Rohn said, “Communication is 20% what you know and 80% how you feel about what you know.”  I recently watched a televised interview with the cast of the popular reality show Duck Dynasty. The interviewer commented that the cast members never watched the show to which one of them replied, “We don’t have to watch it. We live it!”

In a similar vein, a longtime family friend wrote about how he was given the opportunity to deliver a keynote due to a scheduling conflict on my father’s calendar. Several days before the speech, he asked my father if he would look over what he planned deliver to the group. My father told him there was no need to review. “Either the words are in your heart, or you are not ready.”

Jim Rohn and Charlie

Two greats believers and speakers!
Jim Rohn and Charlie “T” Jones

People want to hear what’s in our hearts because it’s the truest example of how we feel about something. And the only way to truly feel something is to have experienced it. That’s why the most powerful speakers and mentors are the ones who have not only talked the talk, but have actually walked the walk, and therefore have the strength of conviction that comes with experience. If you are scared to give a speech, it may be because you don’t believe strongly enough in your topic.

Now this doesn’t mean that you forgo preparation just because you can emote about an experience; on the contrary, preparing how you are going to deliver your beliefs is almost as important as the experience itself. It simply means that, if you lack experience, no amount of preparation will replace it. Without experiential conviction your talk is just theory, and theories are like opinions: everybody’s got one.

Content is king and experience breeds excellence; and a heart-felt belief is the most powerful voice in the universe.

01
Aug
13

The Three Decisions by Charlie “Tremendous” Jones

Three_Decisions1I’ve heard my father give this speech hundreds of times. In fact, it was a major section of his bestselling motivational classic, Life Is TremendousThe Three Decisions: Who are you going to live your life with, what are you going to live your life doing, and who you are going to live your life for. I know my father worked very hard and came from humble beginnings, but I always kind of assumed that he was one of the very few who just got it right the first time. After all, he married my mother at 20 years of age and they stayed married for the next 60 years. He was a world-renowned motivational speaker who had a certain charisma that was unrivaled. His faith in the almighty God after he became a Christian at 23 was as pure and radical a transformation as Paul’s on the road to Damascus.

So easy for him to make these decisions, right? Wrong! When you read The Three Decisions you will see a man who made a decision and then spent his life committing himself to it. There was nothing easy about it. Committed people only look that way to outsiders. This is such a rarity these days we just assume great fortune or that the stars were aligned when someone leads a charmed life. There are no charmed lives. There are only those who live life giving their all to what they’ve committed to with their decisions.

My father said the secret to a lifelong marriage isn’t compatibility, its commitment, and that you cannot make this decision based on how it goes, but solely on integrity; that God does not put romance in marriage, but in people, and it’s up to us to ensure it stays there. My father also said that God never made a job to make a man; He made men to make a job. And if you wanted a better job, you needed to do a better job. And when my father finally made his personal commitment to accept the Bible as absolute truth, he pursued it with all his heart. He would say, “With all my heart I’m telling you this: you ought to know what you believe and why you believe what you believe, and you ought to be willing to believe it so you can get to the heart of what believing is really all about.”

His lifelong mantra was that if what you’re going to get supersedes what you’re going to give, you’re in the wrong ballpark. In other words, if you are always on the make for a better person, job, or god based on what it’s going to do for you, you aren’t even alive. But when you are so ready to commit to one person, one passion, and one master that you’d give it all up, then you are capable of making the three most important decisions of your life and to live life tremendously and triumphantly.

03
Jul
13

TGIF! Thank God I’m Free!!

FREEDOM Flag 3I am a happy person by nature. I am also strong and tolerant. That means I tend to attract those who are, as well as those who are not. Unfortunately, on planet Earth, the latter outnumber the former, so you do the math. While some people create drama, my life seemed destined to attract it.

I became aware of this as a young girl when my father called me a “weirdo magnet.”  So, after a half century of hearing thousands of bitches, complaints, whines, and excuses, I am turning that channel off.  I am finally free to be me, and just in time for Independence Day!!

Freedom from everyone’s expectations!

I am free because I am finally doing exactly what I should with my life. No more chasing other people’s ideas of what a good job is, no more going into jobs to fix what others should have corrected years ago. Why, even my father didn’t ask me to come back and run the family business on his death bed. He knew it had to be my choice alone. I also no longer expect bosses to be fair and ethical. I know that, while there are some who are, there are many more who aren’t. I no longer have to deal with them. I am free to make as much money as I want to give to organizations that I know will make the world a better place.

Freedom from everyone’s drama!

I am free because I no longer allow myself to engage in drama with others, including family members. I just give the old stormtrooper’s wave-off, “Move along, nothing to listen to here.” This may seem harsh, but the true cruelty is when you allow people to continuously wallow in their own self pity and poor self esteem. It’s like the old Nik Kershaw song, “You gotta be cruel to be kind in the right measure.” Emotional vampires don’t care about getting advice from you; they just want to suck the life out of you. Pull out the garlic cloves and holy water and tell them to be gone!!

Freedom from everyone’s manipulation!

I am free because I am true to myself and my beliefs. I don’t get drawn into arguments anymore. I don’t fall prey to subtle forms of manipulation such as false praise or subtle digs. I follow my principles even if they are unpopular, or they cost me a neighbor, an author, a boyfriend, or even a family member. We all die alone and in the end, the only person we have to answer to is God. Don’t believe? Then don’t you worry about it. And don’t try and bring me down because I have faith and you don’t.

You know you’re on the right track when you’re uninterested in looking back. The quieter you become the more you can hear. Know what you believe, and why you believe what you believe, so you can get to the heart of what believing is really all about.

22
Apr
13

Don’t Keep the Faith—Share It!

Charlie Jones reading his Bible in the Holy Land.

Charlie Jones reading his Bible in the Holy Land.

When you are passionate about your faith and passionate about respecting others’ beliefs, it’s amazing the kind of connectivity that transpires. When my father passed, I heard from many whose lives he touched, people from different political, religious, and ideological backgrounds. “Tremendous” was passionate that we each choose what we are going to live our lives for and go all out doing it.

He claimed it was one of the only three decisions that you ever needed to make in life. Decide whom you are going to live your life for, make it yours, and die by it. He respected those who lived life with a tremendous passion and chastised those who didn’t. As the late, great Margaret Thatcher said, “Standing in the middle of the road is very dangerous; you get knocked down by the traffic from both sides.” My father personally witnessed this in his sales career, in his home life, and in his church. He believed it with all his heart.

“Tremendous” Jones spoke to many thousands of groups throughout his lifetime. Some were of a religious or faith-based affiliation, but the majority was not. That never deterred him from veering off point or changing the message to share his faith. I used to wonder why he would take on such a sensitive topic when facing thousands of business people from all walks of life and beliefs until I finally understood. He was just living out loud. He was revealing his most authentic self and just being.

His faith is what drove every second of his life and to not share that would be dishonest with others. His life was a showcase of the grace of God, the forgiveness of Christ, the wisdom of books, and the help of others in a man’s life. And he just couldn’t keep it inside. To do so would be to let others think that his strength to live tremendously came from his own mental and physical strength, and nothing was further from the truth. He never told you what to believe; only that you must answer this question for yourself and live life like you mean it!

13
Feb
12

I will always love you. It’s me I hate.

This past weekend singer, actress, producer, and model Whitney Houston died at the young age of 48. Her career was defined by her beautiful persona and angelic voice as well as her drug use and erratic behavior. Once again we are faced with the confusion of how someone with so much going for them could leave us before their time. It’s hard for us to put conflicting parts of people together into one package but if we take a look in the mirror, we know it’s a part of the human condition for all of us.

The Cognitive Dissonance Theory was developed by Leon Festinger in 1957. As individuals we seek consistency among our cognitions (i.e., beliefs, opinions, actions). When there is an inconsistency between beliefs and behaviors (dissonance), it creates anxiety and something must change to eliminate the dissonance. In other words, something has to give. To alleviate the stress of living a double life, we can focus on the positive of the more important belief, reduce its importance, or change the conflicting belief so it is consistent with our other beliefs or behaviors.

I heard it explained in terms of pleasure or pain. Something gives you so much pleasure or causes you so much pain that you will eliminate the dissonance in order to preserve the pleasure or eliminate the pain. For example, a marriage may experience troubled times, but the recognition of the good it brings causes the couple to reconcile and mend the relationship. Or in the case of pain, a person is arrested and spends time incarcerated. Because of the pain induced they are “scared straight” and go on to live a life in compliance with society’s laws.

Sometimes, though, we don’t hit the high or low and our lives play out in a state of compromise and subtle self-loathing. Take for example a smoker who knows that the habit is detrimental to their health but continues by rationalizing that it keeps their weight in check. In this unfortunate case, the belief has changed to accommodate the unhealthy behavior, sometimes until it claims their life.

We all experience cognitive dissonance in our lives. In some cases, it’s a minor vice and in others its life threatening. In either case, the only thing that is capable of reconciling the discord is the individual themselves. Unfortunately, it’s much easier to enable the discord by altering what’s at the core of our identity. But when we do that, we kill a little bit of ourselves.

They say that the greatest battle is waged within the self. Don’t seek to change the behaviors of the world. Supporters of our vices, addictions and self pity are far and wide and always ready to oblige our demise. Seek to change yourself because there’s only one of you and the world needs to experience all of you it can!

 




Tremendous Tracey


CEO Tremendous Life Books. Book Evangelist

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